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Monday, June 23, 2014

11 Days

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure if you remember this entry from last year: 8 Days, but that was the first year I did a countdown for my birthday. July 4, 2013 was my first birthday without nan and I felt lost. It's funny, it's going to be my second birthday without nan in 11 days. I'll be 25 and I don't really have plans this year. I actually feel depressed about it because I really wanted to be in Michigan for my birthday. I wanted to be moved and I wanted to celebrate being a quarter century in Detroit with close friends. Most of my friends are in the Midwest (of course, if I could celebrate with my foreign friends on a different day, I'd love to celebrate with y'all as well) and I just really wanted to be with them. I guess I just wanted to be starting my new life.

I remember the last birthday I had in a different city. It was my 16th birthday in 2005 when mom, dad and I went to Baltimore for a few days. That was really nice because we arrived on July 3rd and just went on site seeing tours since we knew the Fourth would be crazy. On the morning of July 4, Aunt Kathy called me to sing happy birthday and she asked if I would be getting a new car. I laughed; I still don't have a license (I tried driving from 18-20, but anxiety and other issues prevented that... I might try again once I get settled after the move and figure out how much I'd make), then nan called me to wish me a happy birthday and we'd celebrate together on the 6th. That day, the Civil War museum was opened and since I'm a Civil War buff, dad took me. We also walked part of the Civil War trail. That night we went to McCormick & Schmick's and watched the fireworks over the Inner Harbor. It was a really relaxing night despite the heat and humidity (yes, I've always hated hot and humid weather). I'll have to post some pictures... I am glad I still have my Photobucket account that I created in 2004.

Of course, from the ages of 6-12, we always went to Cape May with mom's family. But, when I turned 16 that's when we went away. From 17-19, we went to dinner around here. Then 20 I was with my second ex and surprisingly that was nice. We went to dinner, watched fireworks and went swimming at my aunt's pool. When I turned 21, I was Muslim and couldn't drink alcohol... I don't want to remember that birthday. Then 22-23 I was in Philadelphia. But, as I do the countdowns, I will write about some of these birthdays. :)

I asked one person if they wanted to do something on my birthday if I was still around. This person said yes; I texted this person last week and texted them again today. Haven't heard anything, so who knows what the next 10 days will bring. I feel doubtful, but c'est la vie. I actually thought about visiting Christina in Cleveland. I've taken Amtrak through Cleveland at night en route to Detroit, but I have never really visited. Christina was just employed at a summer job, though, so probably not. Then I thought about visiting my cousin and her husband in Columbus because I've never been there either, but since deactivating Facebook I haven't kept in touch with her. I also want to save money for the move... so I know that is out. Honestly, if I could, I would just through something in the middle where my Ohio, Michigan, Wisconsin and Chicago friends could all meet and celebrate together. I really miss having nan around. I keep saying, "Next year I will be moved. Next year I'll really celebrate."

I have even thought about asking someone's son... but he's in the Midwest too. Besides, I can't even bring myself to post him as a #MCM for fear of coming off wrong. I was going to post this three times:

"I have been neglecting Monday shout outs to my followers for a few months. I'm followed by a lot of awesome and good people and animals. Some of these people (and animals) are cute as well, haha. I've been really following animal pages lately. One friendly guy is @***. He's awesome and he has a neat job. I like the animal pictures he posts of his pets and animals from work. I hope you don't mind I used your owl picture.The owl is #gorgeous. #OwlGram #AnimalGram #HappyMondayYall."

Instead, I just hit back and didn't post it. I have no idea how it would be construed... given some experiences (Andrew, you know what I'm talking about... I'm sure you know who I'm talking about too) it scares me. Someone said I really should because MCM sounds fun. Eh, I might just continue doing Monoxide as well as Packers players, Ryan Braun and Tigers players. They're safe.

But, I am also doing this for my birthday. I'm going to try to send it around as much as possible: Jessica's Birthday Fundraiser. I'm raising money for 5 different charities. I was thinking of adding my move to the mix (but only $500 where I want each cause to get $1000), but I don't want to seem selfish. I am going to make a few contests on for it with prizes for those members. I'm thinking about having a contest here, but I'm not sure if I'd award prizes.

I look evil in this picture, haha.


  1. I am truly weird about my birthday. No one knows when it choice.

    1. I like throwing contests for my birthday, haha. I belong to and it's a cool site for writers, so I like to do something fun. Sometimes it's difficult being born on a holiday.

  2. I am sure that you will get that new life; you won't be stopped! :) I do understand your disappointment over your upcoming birthday, though; with any luck, your 26th birthday will be in your new home!

    1. That's true! Honestly, I'm shooting for September. Tomorrow I'm calling the tutoring place to see if they need me for the summer. I really hope. Then I'll be celebrating Halloween, Thanksgiving and New Years Eve in my new home. I probably will come home for Christmas... that might be the only holiday I'll come home for. I'm sort of thinking of celebrating dad's birthday before I go. He's in October.